How to be a Friend
(in an Unfriendly World)
Preorder now — it arrives December 9
ALSO AVAILABLE ON
A small book about making connection possible again.
Lately, it’s become harder to stay connected — not just online, but in life.
We’re more “reachable” than ever, and somehow less reached.
In How to Be a Friend (in an Unfriendly World), award-winning filmmaker and teacher Barnet Bain offers a heartfelt guide to what friendship really means, and how it can change everything.
Originally developed from his Columbia University master’s course for psychologists, the book grew out of real conversations about how we connect, listen, and stay kind, even when it’s not easy.
It’s not about fixing people or performing kindness. It’s about remembering how to be with others — and with ourselves — even when the world feels impatient.
Drawing on years of storytelling and teaching, Barnet shares what he’s learned about connection in a way that’s honest, practical, and easy to relate to.
If you’ve ever felt lonely in a crowded room, or wondered how to show up better for the people who matter most, this book will meet you right where you are.
It’s hopeful, tender, and a little bit funny, the kind of read that makes you nod, smile, and maybe text someone you love.
What You’ll Find Inside:
- Simple ways to connect — how to stay open and kind even when life feels overwhelming or people disappoint you.
- Stories that feel familiar — from small moments of misunderstanding to the quiet courage it takes to reach back out.
- Tools for everyday friendship — how to listen without fixing, speak without wounding, and hold boundaries without closing your heart.
- Reflections that meet you where you are — not lofty advice, but gentle reminders that real connection starts right here, with you.
This is a how-to guide and a touchstone. A small-format companion with big impact. A book to keep on your nightstand – or give to someone you care about.
If you’ve ever felt like the world is a little too cold, too fast, or too lonely, How to be a Friend is your reminder that you are not alone – and never have to be.
FREE GIFT
As my gift, you’ll receive my Friendship Field Guide — a free mini-companion to How to Be a Friend (in an Unfriendly World) with short practical ways to strengthen your connections and bring more kindness into everyday life.
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A MESSAGE FOR ALL
“We were never meant to do life alone.
Friendship reminds us of our belonging, that we are needed, and that we matter.
Even the smallest act of care can shift the whole day. In the end, it isn’t grand gestures that hold us together, but the quiet ways we choose each other, over and over again.”
ABOUT BARNET
Barnet Bain is an award-winning filmmaker, author, and teacher known for exploring themes of creativity, connection, and the human spirit. His film credits include Oscar winner What Dreams May Come, Outstanding TV Movie Emmy nominee Homeless to Harvard, and Eckart Tolle’s Milton’s Secret. His new book, How to Be a Friend (in an Unfriendly World), grew out of a Columbia University master’s course he created for psychologists and offers a heartfelt guide to practicing friendship in all its forms.
PRAISE FOR THE BOOK
“In a time when real connection feels harder than ever, this book is a much-needed invitation back to the heart reminding us that friendship isn’t just a comfort—it’s a lifeline. I’ll be recommending this to friends, colleagues, and anyone longing for deeper human connection.”
“Barnet Bain brings ancient wisdom into modern life with clarity and heart. In How to Be a Friend, he reimagines friendship as a path to deeper commitment, generosity, and healing. A profound invitation to experience love in its truest form.”
“With his signature depth, clarity, and compassion, Barnet reminds us that friendship is not just a relationship we have, it’s a way of being. This book is both balm and blueprint for anyone who longs to feel more seen, more connected, more alive.”
“Barnet’s writing made me think about the kind of friend I am—and the kind I want to be. It’s honest, surprising, and full of moments that stay with you.”
“A wonderful guide to building and sustaining great friendships with the most important people in your life, year after year, written by one of the most helpful teachers in America.”
Preorder now —
it arrives December 9
Give it a read. Or better yet, give it to a friend.
